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Handling Aggression: Setting Limits with the Vigorous Snuggle — Hand in Hand Parenting

 

We've all been there. Your child is dysregulated and lashing out. You know that yelling "stop" wouldn't be a good idea, even if it would help. So you need to do the opposite.

"Patty Wipfler, founder of the not-for-profit Hand in Hand Parenting, explains, “You’re doing what one might call a “limbic tackle.” You can’t get through to your child’s prefrontal cortex, because he can’t feel his connections with anyone at the moment. He can’t listen to reason. So you do things his limbic system—the social center of his mind—can understand.”

"By making playful warm physical contact, “You stop the behaviour he’s caught in, but you do it with nonverbal, generous “I want to be close to you” gestures.These are the signals that his limbic system is starved for. These are the signals that let him laugh, or let him break into a big tantrum. These are the signals that, one way or another, will get his mind working again, aware that it’s safe to love and let others love him.”

This is a great guide. Check out the details here.